I have 3 children, twins’ girl 14 and son 12. I have always managed to pay child support to the tune of about $85,000. I had my daughters first and their mother and I have always been close. Although when my son was born and his mother filed for child support, that is when my drama began. The twin’s mother could not accept the fact that the son was getting a portion of my check in the tune of 25%. So she also filed for child support. The drama that I spoke of earlier, started because the twins were born in Indiana and the son was born in Tennessee. Indiana law stated “that child born first” gets bigger portion of child support. Tennessee law states “child who files first” gets bigger portion of child support. I traveled back and forth between states to both Courts; telling me that “they would not honor the other states, Court Order”. I will never forget that dreadful day in June 1995 when I received my pay check, it was for $6.00 and the rest paid$750 dollars for my son and $750 a month for my twins. That not only crippled my sprit it broke me financially. I filled Bankruptcy that year.
My son’s mother was very devious. She did not want me but she could not stand to see me with another woman. When I was married she always figured out how and why to cause confusion. I think that is another story in itself and I will talk about it at a later time. I am a single father 44 years old and I have been paying child support now for my son for 12 years. I have had custody of my daughters since they were 5 years old and they are 14 years old now. My daughter’s mother just was not living a stable life, she was out their. Her family helped me to get custody. My life as a dad has not been easy. I am an only child and my mother passed away the year I received custody of the children. My mother had me when she was sixteen and she did have the support of my father. So I do understand when I hear about kids raising themselves. If laws were in placed the way they are now, years ago my mother would have been in a lot of trouble. When you haven’t been taught how to love, it is hard to for one to express love, and that as been my problem and 70% of the men in the US dealing with child support. I would like to think that the justice system is fair and impartial. Although I don't really think that is the case. I suppose the reason that I am peeved, since the evolution of cocaine to crack, more mothers are giving up there rights as parents and I found out that “there are more dead beat moms than dads”.
I have had my daughters and have never received one dime of support. It’s hard for me to explain to my girls why their mother does not call. I suppose we both have the same thought, will she ever get it together?
My thinking is that a child is supposed to always be with the mother unless she proves herself unworthy! I wish that more men would step up and take part in their children life. With guidance you may not know which way to go, but you have an ideal.
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Tuesday, December 11, 2007
THREE THINGS ONCE GONE, THAT NEVER COME BACK
As a man and a father this should be the structure of how we conduct our life.
Three things in life that, once gone, never come back
1. Time – Is like a river, it has no beginning and no end… It just keeps flowing
2. Words – Are like wild animals, if they are not tame when they come out they can be very destructive!
3. Opportunity – Is like holding a million dollars over a fire; drop it and it’s gone.
Three things in life that can destroy a person
1. Anger – Is a bull in a China Shop, very destructive.
2. Pride – A close mind can never be feed.
3. Unforgiveness - If our Lord and Savior could figure it out, we should too
Three things in life that you should never lose
1. Hope – Belief and hope live on the same street you loose that, what else do you have to live for?
2. Peace – With out this in your life, most people live disconnected.
3. Honesty – Goes with value, you loose honor, and you loose credibility.
Three things in life that is most valuable
1. Love - Makes the world go around.
2. Family & Friends – Are one’s greatest achievements!
3. Kindness – A luxury that one gives to another.
Three things in life that is never certain
1. Fortune – A Blessing from God!
2. Success – Can only be determined in one person mind, for everyone has his own value of what it is.
3. Dreams – Are unlimited, if you think it... It is done.
Three things that make a person
1. Commitment – Is a gift of love to each other.
2. Sincerity – The older you get the more you value what the words actually mean.
3. Hard work – The fuel that burns in you to help you achieve your goals!
Three things that are truly constant
Father - Son - Holy Spirit
( I ask the Lord to bless you, as I pray for you today; to guide you and protect you, as you go along your way. God's love is always with you, God's promises are true. And when you give God all your cares, you know God will see you through. You may pass this along to People you want God to Bless - I just did!
Posted by Jett at 8:32 PM